Gilbert and the Canadian
by furrfurr2001
Summary: A Beauty and the Beast parody. PruCan, one sided FrUk, two sided USUK, tiny suggested pairings. I decided to have fun with the usual stereotype of who's the Beast...and Antonio is Gaston, no pictures, please. Rated T because I am awesomely paranoid.
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue **

A blizzard rages outside the large castle, snow burying anything unfortunate enough to be out in it. That is what shocks the people inside the castle as someone knocks on the large wooden door. "Like, who would be out in weather like this?" a blond man exclaims as he walks over to the door. "Be careful Feliks!" a smaller man pleads. "You know Matthew will be, like, upset if we don't let them in!" he replies. Other people gather to see who it is. A man stumbles inside, robe over their head preventing anyone from discerning their gender. "Help…" the person croaks. "Guys?" a timid voice asks from the top of the stairs. A violet eyed man descends the stairs quickly. Hurrying over, he places a concerned hand on the stranger's forehead. "Alfred?" the (they had now figured out it was a dude) man asks angrily. "W-what?" the skinny Canadian asks, startled. "What are you doing at Matthew's house? I'm going to kill you…" he growls. The stranger throws back his cloak, revealing tanned skin and angry eyes. He points a finger at who he thinks is the American. "You are truly a monster…" Matthew collapses in pain, white fur growing from his body at an alarming rate. "And you will stay that way until someone falls in love with you…and you know. You will stay like this forever if you don't find love before the maple tree in Matt's bedroom dies."


	2. Chapter 2

Gilbert Beilschmidt was by far the most handsome person in the entire village…and the one who was most alone. His personality and looks separated him from the rest. He had bright, sharp red eyes, and white hair the color of snow. "Oi! Gilbert!" a voice called from behind. "I have come, yet again, for your hand in marriage!" shouts the man. "Urg…Zhe awesome me does not have time for this!" Walking away as fast as possible, Gilbert tried to ignore Antonio **(Oh yes, I did. It'll make sense, don't worry. For now, yell in outrage and/or laugh hysterically)** as he walks home to check on his brother, Ludwig.

"Luddy!" he yelled, slamming the door in Antonio's face. "Ludwig?" "Ja?" the blond man asked, looking down the stairs. "Oh, nothing. Just wanted to make sure Antonio hadn't kidnapped you." Ludwig gave a curt nod. "Ja. Feliciano, Kiku and I are leaving for the northern

Vales tomorrow, in case you forgot." the 'Prussian's' face fell slightly, but he quickly covered it up with a smirk. "You gotta stop letting Feli tell you what to do. Last time I checked, he was the weak one…" "Shut up! I am not weak!" Gilbert laughed. "Sure, sure."

"Gilbert! _Gilbert_!" a voice called, waking Gilbert from his sleep. "Wha?" he blearily peered out the window at his brother's exasperated face. "Ciao!" the little Italian Feliciano called. "Konichiwa." Kiku said. "We're leaving, Gil." said Ludwig. "Oh…okay! See ya in three!" he yelled, then ducked back into his bedroom. Sighing, he buried his face in his pillow, and felt the familiar pang of despair. He was always so different from everyone else, so was Ludwig, but he had friends. _I'm always so alone…_

"Luddy? Are you sure we're not lost, ve?" Feliciano asked nervously. "Um…nein. We may be lost." The trio was currently wandering through the Canadian wilderness, snow on the ground thick. "I'm scared," he whimpered. "We'll be fine," assured Kiku. Sudden growling from behind startled the three friends. Hungry red gleamed from the bushes. "Wolves!" Ludwig yelled. "Run!" he urged his horse into a gallop, shooting forwards, Feliciano and Kiku not far behind him.

After about half and hour of hard riding, they caught sight of an old castle, with high iron gates. It was dark, so they couldn't see much. The wolves were still after them, so they couldn't stop and knock. "Hey!" the Italian called desperately. "Please! Open the gates!" There was no sign of movement, and their horses were starting to flag. "Help!" Kiku cried. Suddenly, the gates swung open, admitting the trio, but stopping the wolves. They clanged shut ominously, but they were too terrified to care. "H-hello?" Ludwig cursed inwardly. He hated stuttering.

"G-go away," an equally nervous voice answered. "Hey…We're not going to hurt anyone. You just saved us from the wolves!" "I know," the soft, barely audible voice answered. "Now you need to leave. No one can see me." Kiku frowned thoughtfully. "You…you live here?" "Yes. Nice place, eh? But really. You need to leave, before you see me. Otherwise I can't let you leave." Despite the threat, the man's voice broke, and he seemed upset. "Hey…" Feliciano piped up cheerily. "It can't be that bad, can it?" He pulled out a match and struck it, causing light to illuminate…

Standing in front of them was a massive…polar bear. But there were a few human characteristics, like how thin the bear was, the intelligence in it's eyes, and small changes in it's body shape. But it was still very much a monster. The bear looked at them with fear and regret in it's almost-gentle violet eyes. "Now look what you've made me do," he sighed, and picked the trio by the backs of their coats in carried them inside.

The horses reared in panic and bolted off into the woods. Feli hung frozen in fear, while Ludwig struggled, and Kiku tried to make conversation with the beast. "Um…Mr. Bear…do you have a name?" The bear's voice was muffled by the humans in it's mouth, but it answered. "Yes. Matthew." Kiku asked nothing else, and the bear, Matthew, didn't say anything either.

Matthew carefully put them down in a cage inside the house. It was a roomy cage, but still a cage. Closing the door, and handing the key to a man whom they hadn't noticed before, the bear mutant sat down in front of the door. "I really am sorry about this…" he whispered, looking down. "But, you'll tell everyone, and then they'll come here and kill me. Despite the fact that I'm a bear, I don't want to die." Matthew stood up, and padded lightly out of the room, leaving the three alone with the man. "Hi! I'm, like, Feliks!" he said cheerfully.

"Um…" Feliciano muttered. "Don't worry! I'm not gonna hurt you!" "Unless he decides to mess with your fashion style." said another voice. "Awww, Toris, I'm not that bad, am I?" "Yeah, you are." came yet another voice. "Shut up." Another new man walked out of the shadows, smirking. "Bloody hell…this is so embarrassing. Shut up!" This guy followed the third, green eyes flashing in annoyance. "So, sorry about them." he said, turning to the trapped three.

The servants (at least, that's what Ludwig guessed they were) argued for a while amongst themselves, before remembering their captives. "So! I'm Feliks, as you already know." the loud, Valley Girl voiced man gestured to himself. "This is Toris," he said, pointing to the timid looking brown haired man next to him. "And those two secret lovers-" "Hey!" twin shouts protested. "Are Arthur and Francis. There's more of us, but they're off doing who-cares-what." "Could you please get us out of here, ve~?" Feliciano pleaded. "Sorry." "Nope," "I'm afraid not," "Wish I could." they replied.

"Luddy!" Feli shrieked, pointing to his friend's leg. "You're hurt!" A long scratch ran down the length of the German's lower leg, oozing blood. Arthur walked closer to inspect the wound. "Ouch. None of us are healers, but we could always go get Matthew-" "No!" Ludwig yelped. "Um…I mean, it's fine. We'll be fine."

**Okay! New BATB fic! In case you didn't know:**

**Belle: Gilbert/Prussia (laughed so hard writing this, just realized what I've done…)**

**Beast: Matthew/Canada (why not?)**

**Gaston: Antonio/Spain (don't ask. I don't even know if it's a legit pairing…XD)**

**Father/Brother: Ludwig**

**I don't know if there are anymore…These are just the main ones, and I'll introduce more servants/friends later!**


	3. Chapter 3

Pacing, the Prussian man kept glancing out the window, hoping to see his brother calmly walking down the street with that weird Italian kid and the weird Japanese kid by his sides. But there was no sign of him, and Gilbert was starting to get worried. Finally, he set out from the house to go and find him, only to be stopped by Antonio. "Hola, amigo!" "Not now, Antonio!" he growled, shoving past the annoying Spaniard. As Gilbert walked away, fists clenched, a horse burst from the woods, foaming at the mouth and neighing in terror.

"Easy! If you freak out, that'd be totally unawe-wait. You're Luddy's horse!" The horse didn't respond. "Take me to him!"

Charging through the woods, Gilbert arrived at the castle in no time. It really was beautiful, iron gates with maple leaves, but he wasn't there to admire the scenery. He banged on the gates, yelling. "Oi! D'you have my brother?" "Go away!" a voice called. "No! Do you have my brother or not?" Silence. "Look, whoever you are. I'm trying to save you. If Matthew finds out that you're, like, trespassing, you'll be screwed. And, about your brother…does he have an accent like yours? Blond hair, blue eyes, traveling with two other weirdos?" "Yes! Ja! Is he here?" "Never seen or heard of him in my life. Goodbye."

"W-what? Wait!" Gilbert called, frustrated. No answer. Scowling, he scaled the fence, the maple patterns making it difficult, but he managed. Dropping to the ground lightly, he walked towards the old castle, feet crunching in the crusted snow underfoot. He strode right up to the massive oak wood doors and banged on them. Hard.

"Bloody hell…" a voice muttered from the other side. "Ohonhonhonhon~, what is the problem, cher?" "Shut up!" "I agree with Arthur. Shut up Francis." "Thank you, Liz." "Hold on guys, I think this is the guy that blond German dude was talking about. He has the same weird accent." The door cracked open, and spring green eyes peered out. "You…what is your name?" said a female voice, heavily laced with a Hungarian tint. "Uh…Gilbert. Gilbert Beilschmidt. The door opened wider, revealing that the pretty brown haired girl was holding a frying pan. "If you are lying, I will hit you so hard-" "Eliza? Who are you talking to?" another voice joined the conversation. "Uh…Mattie!" "Hey! You! Let my brother go!" With that, Gilbert barged past and into the house.

"Ludwig! Luddie!" Gilbert screamed. "Here!" another faint voice came up a set of stairs. He shot down the stairs. His brother and his friends were locked in a cage, terrified. "Gilbert! Get out of here!" Ludwig cried. "Quickly! Before-" "What the hell?" a voice growled. The trapped people shrank back, but Gilbert stood defiantly. "Who the hell are you? Why are you keeping my brother here?!" "Get out now, or you'll join them." "Would you abandon _your _brother like that?" There was a sharp intake of breath. "...yes." The person's answer surprised Gilbert. "W-what? Why?" A dark chuckle. "You'll get to find out if you don't leave now." "I'm not like you! Look, how about this? I'll take their place. I'll stay, and my awesomeness makes up for three of them!" "Gil! _No_!" Ludwig interrupted. "Chillax Luddy. I'll be fine!"

But his anxiety was betrayed by how his voice broke. "Alright." the unknown man's voice was quiet. Gilbert's shoulders slumped in relief. "Thank you." "You won't be thanking me for long, not once you see me." "Do you have some sort of self confidence issue?"

Another dark chuckle. "You're one to talk." "True…okay. Let Ludwig and his weird friends out." True to his word, the strangely quiet man seemed to open the cage. Ludwig tumbled out, and only then did Gilbert notice the wound spanning his leg. "So help me Gott…Did you do this?" he yelled, pointing to the injury. "No. I believe it might have happened when they ran away from the wolves." Suddenly, Gilbert was lifted up by the back of his jacket and tossed into the cage.

"If you speak a word about me in town…" a dark growl towards the newly-freed men. "Si!" Feli squeaked, then shot up the staircase. Kiku followed, and Ludwig looked torn. "Go, Luddy. I'll be fine."

But he almost screamed at his brother to come back when he saw his captor for the first time. The 'man' was actually some kind of polar bear monster! "Mein Gott!" he (very manly-ly) yelped. The bear snorted. "Told you so. I'm Matthew, by the way. You're Gilbert, right?" "Um…yeah." The bear nodded, seemingly satisfied. Then it slipped away, amazingly quiet for such a massive creatures. "Wait! I didn't…get to say goodbye."

Gilbert was curled up on the floor, completely and utterly miserable. "Hey! You! Like, German guy!" "It's Prussian." "Whatever. We're getting you outta here!" the Prussian looked up at last to see a crowd of people, mostly people he didn't know, waiting for him. The door was open. "Outta the castle?" "No," came the disappointing answer. "Out of the cage." Oh well. Better some room than a cage.

"So…question." Gilbert was currently walking between Francis and Felkis. "Are you guys, like, that bear guy's servants?" "What? Nah, Mattie's a friend! But we can't leave the castle." Arthur clamped a hand over the Polish man's mouth. "Thats enough about that. We're here." But when Elizaveta pushed open the door, Gilbert couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. The room was small, but cozy. The main color scheme was red and white, something Gilbert could appreciate. But what startled him the most was the overall welcoming feeling that permeated the atmosphere.

"Um…wow." Gilbert muttered. "Hey…won't Matthew be mad that you guys let me out?" "Nah. He knows! You know…maybe you should eat with him tonight. Get to know him!" Felkis smiled cheerfully. "Um…no." The whole crowd of people gaped at him. "Uh…what is it?" "Damn…oh, right. He hasn't had them yet." Toris laughed, earning a snicker from the whole group. "Had what yet?" "Matt's pancakes."


	4. Chapter 4

Despite the so-called godly pancakes, Gilbert still didn't come to dinner with the bear. Eliza almost hit him with a frying pan, but was held back by her boyfriend, Roderich. Plus, Gilbert was on the floor laughing at being hit with a frying pan for not eating pancakes. Roderich dragged her out, and shook his head at Gilbert's stubbornness. "Arthur and I will smuggle some out tonight, and then-" The Frenchman was cut off. "Whoever said anything about me going with you?" Arthur exclaimed, and the two started bickering again.

"What's the deal with those guys?" Gilbert asked Toris. "Oh, Arthur and Francis? Well, Francis basically desperately wants Arthur, but Arthur's in love with someone else. We haven't seen him in ages, so we're trying to encourage Arthur to move on." "Who?" "He goes by Alfred…" The hate with which the nervous Lithuanian said the name shocked him. "Um…okay?"

True to his word, Francis smuggled some leftover pancakes into Gilbert's room. Of course, he was hesitant, but he was hungry. When he put the first bite into his mouth, his eyebrows shot up. "Woah! And you say _that bear _makes these?" "Oui. Matthieu is quite a cook." Francis answered. "Okay, I'm eating with…Matthew…next time. But do you guys eat there as well?" "Duh," Arthur rolled his eyes. "Of course we do. We're his friends, not servants!"

"Well? Come on! Let's go!" Gilbert said, albeit a bit nervously. But Francis and Felkis blocked his path, identical evil expressions on their faces. "Oh no." Francis sneered. "You are _not _going to dinner with Matthew dressed like _that_." Felkis nodded, nose wrinkled in disgust. "Well, he can't be _late _either, so let's skip the fashion show and _get down there_!"

Arthur shoved past the two blonds, providing an easy opening for the Prussian. "Thanks," Gilbert whispered as they walked. "Um…how about you repay me by not being an arse to Mattie? He, uh, doesn't exactly know you're coming." Arthur muttered back. "You're kidding, right?" "Sorry. Let's go, okay?"

Twin shouts echoed around the stairway, causing Gilbert to look around in confusion. Arthur threw his arm out and slammed him into a wall, right as two kids shot past them into the hall, laughing. "Peter!" the Brit yelled at one of them. "Sorry Mr. Kirkland!" one of them called backwards. They burst through some doors and into a large room. "Matthew!" they yelled, in unison. Arthur walked in the door calmly, while Gilbert just hesitantly followed.

Both boys were chattering excitedly to the bear, who was sitting quietly, Elizaveta leaning against his side. Matthew's violet eyes locked with Gilbert's red ones, and for once it was the albino who looked away first.

Turns out, dinner was actually enjoyable. All of the people who lived in the house were really…good…friends. They argued as much as they could, others inserting sarcasm whenever they could. All of them had weird pasts, and many of them looked strange, so Gilbert felt right at home. He observed Matthew closely. The bear was almost ignored, he was so quiet, but he picked the best moments to snark out unexpectedly, that the others never _really _forgot about him. The two children were often found climbing on him. But as the night wore on, everything was forgotten. Dinner was finished, but the conversation continued. But when Liz busted out her frying pan, and everyone scattered.

The Prussian found himself in the garden. The blanket of snow covered everything, and the whole place was quiet and still. Then the sky burst to life. "The Northern Lights," he breathed, staring up in wonder. "Pretty cool, huh?" a voice laughed, from behind the awestruck man. Whipping around, he was greeted by the sight of Matthew, an amused expression on his face. "Honestly, being out here is probably the only thing that's kept me sane all these years." he continued, tipping his head up. "Can you do me a favor?" "Uh…sure?" "Could you stay away from upstairs? There's stuff up there I don't need you seeing." "That's like the surefire way to get me up there." Matthew laughed, violet eyes twinkling. "God…let's make sure you never meet Alfred!"

"Who's this Alfred guy everyone keeps talking about? There seems to be a mixture of love and hate for him." The bear kept his head pointed at the sky. "Alfred is a sore subject. Don't bring him up around anyone here. They might talk about him, but don't ask." "Is he dead?" "What? No, not at all. But if Toris, or Tino gets ahold of him, he won't stay that way for long." "Oh…Finnish sniper, huh?" "Yes."

This was the longest conversation that he'd had with the bear, and didn't want it to end, but Matthew still unnerved him. He was a talking _polar bear _for god's sake! "Well…nice talking to you." He backed away quickly, ducking inside out of the cold. But turning back, he could still see a silhouette under the blazing sky, staring upwards.

But the conversation irked him. Finally, when he was sure Matthew wasn't around, he ran up the only staircase, and darted through the first door. It was a bedroom. A beautiful maple tree grew from the floor, almost as if it was saying: "Screw gravity!" It really was beautiful, but the leaves seemed to be falling off slowly. "Gilbert?" a voice murmured from behind him. He winced, knowing who it was. Matthew's head was tipped to one side, seeming curious rather than angry. "What're you doing up here?" "Uh…told ya so?" he tried. The bear sighed. "Please leave…"

He didn't hesitate to slip past and out, but not before he saw a picture of two people, his age, with their arms around each other. The blue eyed man looked vaguely familiar, but the other, violet eyed man…he was adorable! And he also looked like Gilbert had seen him before, the feeling stronger than the other. Who was he?

"I don't have time for this…I have to go see if Luddy is ok!" the Prussian muttered to himself, steeling himself to go out. Matthew had technically asked Gilbert to leave, meaning that…whatever. "Kesesese~ I'm such an idiot." Stepping outside, he promptly fell and scraped his arm on the ice. "F*ck." he muttered, then took of running (carefully) into the woods.

Gasping for breath sooner than he'd like, Gilbert stopped to rest against a tree. The scratch on his arm was bleeding slightly, and was starting to sting something fierce. Distant howls echoed through the hills, causing the runaway to stiffen. _The blood_…he thought, before setting off hurriedly again.

Too late. Always too late. The wolves had caught up to him, and now he was surrounded. Backing up slowly, he tripped. "Sh*t!" he cursed, knowing he was doomed. He closed his red eyes, bracing himself in terror for the immense pain he was about to experience. But before the wolves reached him, a roar seemingly broke the sound barrier, it was so loud. A massive bear hurled out of the trees and tore the wolves apart.

Curling up in a ball, trembling, the Prussian man watched in morbid fascination as the bear made quick work of the pack. But one snuck up behind it and slashed open it's shoulder. The wolf ran off after a glare from the bear, who ignored it and padded lightly towards Gilbert. "Please don't eat me…" came the muted mutter from the albino. "Why on earth would I do that?" the bear laughed. "Matthew?!" he screamed, throwing himself at the bear and hugging him. "Thank you…"

"My pleasure." said said person/bear warmly. "Now come on. We need to get back to my place." Catching Gilbert's look, he continued. "You were going in the wrong direction, and it's going to get colder at night." "That's not physically possible." he complained, walking besides the surprisingly graceful creature. "Believe it or not, it's true. Not that I can feel it anyway." the bear teased, shaking his think coat of fur. "No fair~!" he jumped onto the bear and buried his face in his fur. "Jeez…" Matthew muttered, but didn't throw the human off.

When the mansion came into sight, their pace slowed considerably. Matt was flagging. "Sh*t," Gilbert muttered, remembering the scratches on his savior's shoulder. "Hey man, can you make it to the house?" he asked. "Imma big strong polar bear," he muttered back. "I'll be fine."

But the second they crossed the threshold, Matthew collapsed. "Shoot…Eliza! Vash! Toris! Anybody! Help!" he yelled, hoping someone would answer. "Gilbert, you bastard if anything-Mattie!" the Hungarian cried, and slid down the banister, with her boyfriend and Tino behind her. "Matthew!"

"Mein Gott…this is all my fault." "Yes it is, so get over here and help you bastard!" Arthur yelled at him, apparently overhearing the albino's self-pity. Gilbert stepped over, and ripped off a piece of his clothing **(not crotch cloth, for all of you perverts who are thinking like me) **and bound the bear's shoulder tightly. "Mattie?" Gilbert asked, unconsciously using the nickname. He poking his shoulder. "Al…knock it off…it's too early to wake up," he muttered, not fully awake yet. Roderich and Arthur chuckled at his complaint. "Kesesesesese~ I'm not Alfred." "Wha-oh. Hey Gilbert. Uh, if you don't mind me asking, what happened?" "No prob, man. You got scratched totally un-awesomely on the shoulder when you saved my *ss. Then you passed out." "Oh." Matthew lay his head down on the floor again, tired. Gilbert made a split second decision. He sat down and leaned against the bear's side. Matt blinked but didn't protest.

The two unlikely friends fell asleep together, while Elizaveta (poorly) tried to contain her fangirl squeals.

"Alfred!" Feliciano shrieked, pounding on the door to his friend's house. "Wha? Feli, what are you-" "Monster! There was a, a monster, and it-" "What? M-monster?" the American yelped. "Not a monster, Feli. It was a bear. A giant bear." Ludwig assured him. "It _did _talk, Ludwig." Kiku reminded him. "Uh…Holy cow! Man, you're bleeding!" Alfred jerked the trio into his house, and began treating the wound. "Where were you anyway?" he asks curiously.

"We were…up north." "Did you-" "No. Sorry, Alfred." The American's face fell, and he looked down quickly. His brother had disappeared into the northern wilderness, around the same time the love of his life had. "S'ok." he muttered back. The three had never met the fabled Arthur Kirkland before, but assumed they would hear news of him if he was still alive. "Everyone keeps disappearing." Alfred murmured. The American finished the job, and helped the German to his feet. "Well, I'm afraid it's getting dark, and you should be getting home! I've got a trip tomorrow, and need to get my rest!"

An unmistakable invitation to _get out_. Alfred needed to mourn for a while. They left, unaware of green eyes watching from a window.

**Hi guys! Sorry about late update times! Consider this story a consolation? I've reached a bit of a block, but I'll get over it soon! I feel so stupid, posting the prologue first, but whatevs. I love all my readers! *heart* Furrfurr2001!**


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